Before I left Jacksonville I became OBSESSED with the idea of a Rihanna Summer.
One day I was listening to ANTI going “wow. I relate to all of this.”
Then I thought about it. Rihanna is carefree. Rihanna consistently does what she wants at all times. Rihanna seemingly didn’t have a care in the world. She went after what she wanted and dared someone to stop her.
I wanted to be like Rihanna. So, my Rihanna Summer was born. I told myself that this summer I would do what I wanted when I wanted and I wouldn’t consider what other people would think about my decisions. It started with growing the balls to move to NY and then spilled over into the rest of my life.
We’re a few…moments into summer and this mindset is something that I wish I would have had my entire life.
I’ve played it safe my whole life. I stayed with someone who felt familiar for way too long because he was “safe.” I took a job immediately after college that wasn’t a good fit because it was “the right thing to do.” I kept my hair “appropriate” because I didn’t want to offend a future employer or teacher. I kept my head down and did the work.
As I’ve become more comfortable with who I am I’ve realized that doing things to please others has never ended up well for me. I’ve desperately wanted to be the perfect friend/pledge brother/big sister/daughter/ employee/girl friend that I became miserable.
So, sometime in Jacksonville, I shifted my focus from being perfect to everyone else to doing what I wanted to do, just like Rihanna.